Self-discipline is a word used to describe a process of learning how to take conscious control of your actions. It is not a personality trait or something
you are born with. It is a specific thought methodology, a mental resource,
that allows you to change a belief or belief system when it is in conflict
with some goal or objective. Self-discipline is a more direct method of
effecting some change because you would be purposefully acting in a
manner that is in direct conflict with whatever you want to change.
So I would define self-discipline as willfully behaving outside of the boundaries of some belief (dealing with the emotional discomfort your actions will produce) to accomplish a certain goal or task that is inconsistent with that belief. If you work outside of that belief long enough, it will eventually de-energize. The rate at which the underlying belief will deenergize is really not a function of time but rather intensity. In other words, the greater the intensity of our willingness and resolve, the faster the conflicting belief will lose its power.
You can change these or any other definitions of yourself. However, you must first identify them and then determine how useful they are in helping you get what you want. You could ask yourself, "Is this belief a resource or obstacle to the successful fulfillment of my goal?" One way you can change these definitions is to build a mental resource for the sole purpose of changing beliefs that are not useful. I am going to call this mental resource "self-discipline."
Here is an exercise that will help you learn specifically how to develop and use self-discipline in your life. The purpose of this exercise is to help you learn how to use your mind in different ways. You'll be training your mind to stay positively focused on what you consciously want. You will also learn how to gauge internal resistance from belief systems, and how to build mental resources for taking conscious control of your life.
1. Make a list of several things you dislike doing, feel you can't do, or would like to stop doing or some things you have never done before and think you might enjoy You could start a jogging or exercise program or take out the garbage on a regular basis, for example.
2. Once you have your list, look it over and pick a task that has a very low priority in your life or one of the least important items.
3. Next, tell yourself in the most positive way that doing this new task you have consciously decided upon is something you now want in your life. Don't say you are going to try and do it. A commitment to try to fulfill a goal is not strong enough.
4. Set up a rigid schedule for yourself to accomplish this new goal.
5. With each attempt to adhere to your schedule, keep track of your thought process or stream of thoughts by writing them down. At this point you might be saying to yourself, "How do I keep track of my thought process?"
In the physical environment we are constantly being bombarded with all sorts of information competing for our attention. We are aware of many things going on around us simultaneously. In effect our consciousness is split in many different directions at the same moment. Use a part of your consciousness to pay attention to what is going on inside of your head. You will be using a part of yourself to monitor your stream of thoughts as if they didn't belong to you. If you can temporarily act as if you were monitoring someone else's stream of thoughts, it may be much easier to gather the information you need to make this exercise meaningful.
6. As you attempt to adhere to your schedule, do you find yourself experiencing resistance, excuses, or rationalizations? If so, notice how these thoughts divert your conscious attention away from your goal. This is a classic example of a conflict between the conscious goal you have set for yourself and your belief system that doesn't have a belief or definition that corresponds with what you consciously want to do.
7. At this point you need to redirect your attention to the task you have chosen for yourself. What is most important is that you understand the necessity of directing as much energy toward the fulfillment of your goal as possible. You will have to generate more power toward keeping your attention focused on your goal than the amount of energy being directed through the beliefs that distract your attention away from your goal.
However, there is one aspect to this exercise I must caution you about. Redirecting your attention away from what distracts you to what you consciously want, does not mean that you suppress or deny what may be distracting you. Acceptance and acknowledgment of what exists within you will allow you to work with it. Suppression and denial require a lot of energy; this has the effect of supporting the beliefs you are trying to suppress. Be gentle with yourself.
Each time you set out to accomplish your task, and do so, you create a resource that helps you do it again. Each success will draw some energy away from the beliefs that acted as obstacles. With each success you will also be allocating energy to the new definition of yourself. This new definition allows you to start the task each time with greater and greater ease until the definition becomes a fundamental part of your mental system. When that happens, your actions concerning this task will seem automatic.
The most important aspect of this exercise is the experience you gain in understanding the process of changing beliefs. Each time you set out to change a belief or set of beliefs, you'll gain a resource that enables you to do it again. Each success you experience will help develop another set of beliefs that allow you to change more beliefs if and when it suits your purposes. You will establish a new definition of yourself that says: "I believe I can identify and change any belief about myself that may be in conflict with my conscious goals." For this exercise to be effective, you must keep a few rules in mind. First, start the exercise with a task or goal that is truly insignificant and has little meaning in your life. The objective of the exercise is learning how to manipulate your inner environment consciously and direct your conscious focus of attention. The goal you decide upon as the object of the exercise should not have a lot of value attached to the outcome. If it does, that would be an indication you may be taking on some very powerful and entrenched belief systems. This is something you definitely want to avoid until you have developed the necessary skills and resources.
Then, recognize that from the moment we are born, we are taught how to manipulate the outer physical environment; however, you may not have the resources to be even minimally effective at manipulating the mental environment. As a result, it is extremely important that you do not judge your ability to execute the schedule you set up according to the standards of performance you expect of yourself in the physical environment. If you expect too much and judge your ability harshly, it will only negate your efforts and set up a fear and inadequacy cycle. The less you expect of yourself, the faster you will progress. An expectation can easily become a demand that it be fulfilled. Demands usually generate a certain amount of fear that the demands will not be met. When you are working in the inner environment, fear will always negate your positive efforts unless your intent is to identify the source of your fear.
Finally, not having any expectations from your efforts to carry out your plan will also have the secondary benefit of helping you to learn to accept whatever you accomplish as being all right. Any step, no matter how small, is a step. Just deciding you want to do this exercise is significant, even if you don't follow through with it right away. You may come back to it some day when you have more of a "sense" of the power you will acquire from the ability to manipulate your inner environment consciously to be consistent with your goals. So, to keep yourself from having any expectation about how well you should do at this or any other exercise I offer you, I suggest you consider yourself an infant in a brand new environment. You will have to learn how to stand up before you can begin to walk or run.
So I would define self-discipline as willfully behaving outside of the boundaries of some belief (dealing with the emotional discomfort your actions will produce) to accomplish a certain goal or task that is inconsistent with that belief. If you work outside of that belief long enough, it will eventually de-energize. The rate at which the underlying belief will deenergize is really not a function of time but rather intensity. In other words, the greater the intensity of our willingness and resolve, the faster the conflicting belief will lose its power.
You can change these or any other definitions of yourself. However, you must first identify them and then determine how useful they are in helping you get what you want. You could ask yourself, "Is this belief a resource or obstacle to the successful fulfillment of my goal?" One way you can change these definitions is to build a mental resource for the sole purpose of changing beliefs that are not useful. I am going to call this mental resource "self-discipline."
Here is an exercise that will help you learn specifically how to develop and use self-discipline in your life. The purpose of this exercise is to help you learn how to use your mind in different ways. You'll be training your mind to stay positively focused on what you consciously want. You will also learn how to gauge internal resistance from belief systems, and how to build mental resources for taking conscious control of your life.
1. Make a list of several things you dislike doing, feel you can't do, or would like to stop doing or some things you have never done before and think you might enjoy You could start a jogging or exercise program or take out the garbage on a regular basis, for example.
2. Once you have your list, look it over and pick a task that has a very low priority in your life or one of the least important items.
3. Next, tell yourself in the most positive way that doing this new task you have consciously decided upon is something you now want in your life. Don't say you are going to try and do it. A commitment to try to fulfill a goal is not strong enough.
4. Set up a rigid schedule for yourself to accomplish this new goal.
5. With each attempt to adhere to your schedule, keep track of your thought process or stream of thoughts by writing them down. At this point you might be saying to yourself, "How do I keep track of my thought process?"
In the physical environment we are constantly being bombarded with all sorts of information competing for our attention. We are aware of many things going on around us simultaneously. In effect our consciousness is split in many different directions at the same moment. Use a part of your consciousness to pay attention to what is going on inside of your head. You will be using a part of yourself to monitor your stream of thoughts as if they didn't belong to you. If you can temporarily act as if you were monitoring someone else's stream of thoughts, it may be much easier to gather the information you need to make this exercise meaningful.
6. As you attempt to adhere to your schedule, do you find yourself experiencing resistance, excuses, or rationalizations? If so, notice how these thoughts divert your conscious attention away from your goal. This is a classic example of a conflict between the conscious goal you have set for yourself and your belief system that doesn't have a belief or definition that corresponds with what you consciously want to do.
7. At this point you need to redirect your attention to the task you have chosen for yourself. What is most important is that you understand the necessity of directing as much energy toward the fulfillment of your goal as possible. You will have to generate more power toward keeping your attention focused on your goal than the amount of energy being directed through the beliefs that distract your attention away from your goal.
However, there is one aspect to this exercise I must caution you about. Redirecting your attention away from what distracts you to what you consciously want, does not mean that you suppress or deny what may be distracting you. Acceptance and acknowledgment of what exists within you will allow you to work with it. Suppression and denial require a lot of energy; this has the effect of supporting the beliefs you are trying to suppress. Be gentle with yourself.
Each time you set out to accomplish your task, and do so, you create a resource that helps you do it again. Each success will draw some energy away from the beliefs that acted as obstacles. With each success you will also be allocating energy to the new definition of yourself. This new definition allows you to start the task each time with greater and greater ease until the definition becomes a fundamental part of your mental system. When that happens, your actions concerning this task will seem automatic.
The most important aspect of this exercise is the experience you gain in understanding the process of changing beliefs. Each time you set out to change a belief or set of beliefs, you'll gain a resource that enables you to do it again. Each success you experience will help develop another set of beliefs that allow you to change more beliefs if and when it suits your purposes. You will establish a new definition of yourself that says: "I believe I can identify and change any belief about myself that may be in conflict with my conscious goals." For this exercise to be effective, you must keep a few rules in mind. First, start the exercise with a task or goal that is truly insignificant and has little meaning in your life. The objective of the exercise is learning how to manipulate your inner environment consciously and direct your conscious focus of attention. The goal you decide upon as the object of the exercise should not have a lot of value attached to the outcome. If it does, that would be an indication you may be taking on some very powerful and entrenched belief systems. This is something you definitely want to avoid until you have developed the necessary skills and resources.
Then, recognize that from the moment we are born, we are taught how to manipulate the outer physical environment; however, you may not have the resources to be even minimally effective at manipulating the mental environment. As a result, it is extremely important that you do not judge your ability to execute the schedule you set up according to the standards of performance you expect of yourself in the physical environment. If you expect too much and judge your ability harshly, it will only negate your efforts and set up a fear and inadequacy cycle. The less you expect of yourself, the faster you will progress. An expectation can easily become a demand that it be fulfilled. Demands usually generate a certain amount of fear that the demands will not be met. When you are working in the inner environment, fear will always negate your positive efforts unless your intent is to identify the source of your fear.
Finally, not having any expectations from your efforts to carry out your plan will also have the secondary benefit of helping you to learn to accept whatever you accomplish as being all right. Any step, no matter how small, is a step. Just deciding you want to do this exercise is significant, even if you don't follow through with it right away. You may come back to it some day when you have more of a "sense" of the power you will acquire from the ability to manipulate your inner environment consciously to be consistent with your goals. So, to keep yourself from having any expectation about how well you should do at this or any other exercise I offer you, I suggest you consider yourself an infant in a brand new environment. You will have to learn how to stand up before you can begin to walk or run.
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